Top 5 Super Bowl Halftime Shows

Image Via: Google Images & Kirshner Events

By Derek Chomyn

It’s that time of the year again. Super Bowl Sunday. A Sunday that even non-sports fans love. Of course you have the game but for most people at the Super Bowl party, that’s not why they’re watching. It’s like Thanksgiving. Turkey is obviously the main dish but people are there for the sides. Commercials, food, alcohol, and of course the halftime show. We’ve had some pretty great halftime shows in our lifetime and Travis Scott flying in on an ¿asteroid? is NOT one of them. So let’s break down the five best and see where they land on this list.

5. Aerosmith, Britney Spears and *NSYNC

Let me preface this by saying I watched a lot of halftime shows and it was tough to narrow it down to a top five. However, a top 10 list is just too much work for me and I’m not doing that. Now this is a star studded cast. In 2001 who was hotter than Britney and NSYNC? Oh yeah, nobody. Aerosmith was there to cater to the middle-aged women that need something to drool over but hey they killed it (even though Steven Tyler creeps me the fuck out). Plus to top it all off was Mary J Blige and Nelly coming out to help finish the show with a rendition of Walk This Way.

4. Katy Perry

You may be thinking “Why is Katy Perry so high on your ranking?” I’ll tell you why, LEFT SHARK. Left shark stole the show becoming an immediate internet meme. I was so focused on left shark that I forgot the “I Kissed A Girl” performer was even there. Missy Elliot also made an appearance completely showing up Katy. But left shark was “Workin It” and “Getting his Freak on” and absolutely hijacked the entire performance. I’m pretty positive the guy in the costume had too many party favors or just didn’t pay attention in practice but I’d be wrong if I said it wasn’t captivating.

3. Michael Jackson

The King Of Pop, the smooth criminal, the man in the mirror. Michael Jackson is an ICON (Rest his soul) and he revolutionized halftime shows for years to come. He played the hits, crowd went fuckin’ bonkers as they should have. He crushed the Billie Jean performance. Most importantly though he finished the show playing “Heal the World” which he shouted out kids from all over the world. That pulls on your heart strings. The performance was an emotional roller coaster. Something you don’t expect at a sports spectacle like the Super Bowl but as I continue this list I have to point out none of this would be possible without Michael Jackson changing the way of the halftime show.

2. Janet Jackson and Justin Timberlake

What else needs to be said here besides titty. We got to see a titty folks. The performance was cool and all but JT getting into his groove and popping out a Janet titty, now THAT is what the halftime show needed. Yes, the titty was covered in a “pasty” but it didn’t leave much to the imagination. It was a stunner of a moment and something that will be referenced forever as the “wardrobe malfunction”. Whether it was a malfunction or it was done to create a buzz I don’t care. A titty is a titty and it was one of the most memorable halftime show moments of all time.

1. MOTHA FUCKIN PRINCE BABY

Prince MURDERED this halftime show. He’s almost not even a real person. You can’t write a script better than this halftime show. I mean c’mon it literally started raining during “Purple Rain.” That’s Hollywood shit. His outfit was electric. His aura is electric. Everything about Prince is electric. He played covers of “All Along the Watchtower” “We Will Rock You” and even the Foo Fighters “Best of You,” all while melting faces with his guitar shredding. This halftime show is the pinnacle of all halftime shows. Truly the greatest of all time.

Honorable mention to Tom Petty and The Rolling Stones. Those guys are all legends. And fuck Coldplay that performance was whack as fuck and if Beyonce and Bruno Mars didn’t come out it would be the worst ever.